World AIDS Day

Today is World AIDS Day. While I typically blog about eating disorders, body image and beauty, I sometimes like to take a minute to write about other things that are on my heart! And today, this is one of them.

Last night, I was talking to one of my best friends who lives in Chicago... we don't always have the best luck connecting via phone (she is a resident who works nights sometimes- think Grey's Anatomy) but when we do, we usually laugh a lot and have really good conversations about our lives. We share a passion for Africa, and she introduced me to vanilla chai (my favorite) at the first Student Global AIDS Campaign meeting we went to in college- thanks, Ali:). She is currently an OBGYN resident at Northwestern- and is one of the smartest, funnest girls I know. Well this past year, through a series of chaotic circumstances one night at work, she ended up getting stuck with an HIV infected needle. I was scared when she asked me to pray for her, but thankfully, the risk of contracting HIV this way is very low. Still, as small as the risk was, there was still a chance that she could be HIV positive... and that was scary! After several tests (and weeks of anti-retroviral drugs), her results came back negative. I was and still am so thankful that she is ok! (So is her husband!:))

In light of it being World AIDS Day, I was thinking about how lucky she was to have access to ARV drugs. These drugs are expensive and not everyone has access to them. The theme this year for World AIDS Day 2010 is 'Universal Access and Human Rights.' Human rights violations (sex trade and trafficking) fuel the incidence of HIV. The focus this year is on protecting human rights while also working to provide better prevention efforts globally as a means of cutting the occurrence of transmission. Take some time today to think about your health, your body, your rights as a person, and consider how you might help someone who isn't as fortunate to have what you do. To learn more about World AIDS Day, and ways that you can get involved, follow this link.

How Far Does the Thin Ideal Extend??

According to a recent study published, preschool aged girls- as young as 3!!- indicate a preference towards thinness. How is that even possible??! I was actually skeptical when I saw this headline! But as I read this study (here!), it all started sounding way too believable. I obviously get that media has an impact upon how we define beauty, and I also am all too familiar with the ways in which modeling can influence us. I'm not talking about supermodels walking the runway... but about behaviors and attitudes that we pick up on by observing those around us. Anyways, in this study, the researchers tried to determine the childrens attitudes about weight by watching them choose game pieces (for board games like Candyland- my favorite!) that they had specifically constructed- a thin girl, an average girl, and an overweight girl. They watched the girls choose the pieces and interact with them, and asked them about the pieces as well. While it is very difficult to study body issues and perceptions in 3 year olds, there were some pretty strong reactions among the children to the game pieces. Some of them were very reluctant to play the game using the overweight girl game piece, and the majority would have rather been the average girl if they could not be the thin girl. To read more of the findings regarding the study, follow the link above- or here!

So what can we do in the face of some discouraging news about innocent little girls picking up on the thin ideal at the age of 3 years old?! Well, I think that regardless of whether or not we have children, nieces/nephews, interact with children daily, etc.. there are things that we can do. First, emphasize health over weight. Helping children (and ourselves, really!) to place the focus on our bodies being strong and able to engage in activities that we enjoy takes the focus off of a number. Second, avoid fat talk! What is fat talk?? Anything that reinforces unhealthy beliefs and attitudes about our bodies. ("I look SO fat in this!" "Oh, wow, you look great, have you lost weight?" "I need to lose ten pounds" "She's too fat to be wearing that") I have written a lot about fat talk before- check out this link or this one for more info! Lastly, if you do have children or if you are ever around kids, encourage and affirm them for who they are- their personalities, their character traits, positive things that they have done, their interests- rather than how they look! This extends to us grown-ups as well:) I think that if we can start to redefine beauty (and the thin ideal) by focusing on beauty as more than just our looks (by focusing on our hearts, our minds, our faith), then we might begin to know our true worth and value.

In honor of Fat Talk Free Week coming up (it starts Monday!), I wanted to point you to a few great reads that have been published online in the last few days. The first is an article that I just read-- a very empowering and bold interview given by plus size model and winner of America's Next Top Model cycle 10, Whitney Thompson. She is very outspoken about her role in the modeling industry as a voice of change and as one promoting healthy body image. In fact, she is an ambassador (aka- spokesperson) for the National Eating Disorders Association, NEDA. It is def worth checking out; Sunny Gold's article and interview with Whitney can be found by following this link to the Huffington Post (what else?!).

The other article is one that was just published in Newsweek and has been getting a lot of attention. Newsweek wrote an article mentioning Fat Talk Free Week- a pretty big deal, as far as creating awareness! It's a great article that defines the essence of Fat Talk Free Week. Check it out here. And in the meantime, consider how you can start cutting the fat talk out of your life. Start small! More to come in the next few days!

On Asking For Help-- And A Horse Named Dude

Last week, I took a little road trip to Virginia where I attended an onsite visit at Remuda Ranch. Remuda is a residential treatment facility for girls and women with eating disorders- they just recently updated their website, and it's worth checking out (follow this link to view it!). Anyways, while I knew quite a bit about Remuda Ranch before visiting, I was really impressed with the quality of care that they provide to patients. I was also impressed with the commitment and value placed on spiritual healing as well! Remuda's treatment program is centered around a Christian approach, however, girls and women of all faiths are respected and welcome and can decide how little or how much they want to participate and interact with the faith piece.

Anyways, Remuda really is a ranch- it's not just called that:-). There is a full service barn complete with horses. No cell phone service, no Starbucks, and nothing but dirt roads and beautiful scenery. Among the therapeutic activities used with patients is equine therapy, which uses experiences and interactions with horses to teach the patients things about themselves, facilitating insight and growth. I was a little skeptical before I really knew anything about it, but after learning more and seeing different demonstrations, it is amazing how much you can learn about yourself from a horse!

I volunteered to help out with an activity and got to meet Dude, an Arabian horse:-). My task was to get him over a jumping bar without touching him. Last time I checked, I wasn't a horse trainer-- and I had NO idea how to make this happen. Once I was in the ring with Dude, I secretly regretted volunteering because I was feeling a little in over my head!! After several frustrating minutes of Dude eating dirt and ignoring my commands to jump over the bar, I finally asked Dave, the man in charge, if he had any suggestions! He didn't (of course), but some of the other therapists that were watching were able to give me some ideas. They told me to take the bar off of the jumping post, and lay it on the ground and have Dude walk over the bar. After much coaxing and guiding him from behind, Dude finally stepped over the bar!!

After processing what happened with Dude (I love that the horse's name is Dude, by the way), Dave mentioned that this particular activity can be useful in illustrating how important it is to ask for help!! He said that he will watch people struggling with an activity like this, not knowing what to do, and watching them get frustrated (like me!), and angry- and yet they don't ask for help. Or, if they do, they wait a really long time before asking. You might see how this applies to eating disorder recovery, and even more so, life!! We were not created to be alone, to have no support or community in our lives. And yet sometimes our pride or life circumstances keep us from reaching out and asking for help! Sometimes admitting we need help and are unable to do things on our own can be a huge step forward... and what a relief to know that we don't have to carry a burden all on our own! Sometimes we don't ask for help because we're not even sure of what we need! But just being able to share a burden with a friend, family member or loved one can be a way of reaching out for help and support.

A History of Our Bodies and Beauty

One thing I have been thinking about lately is trends. They come and go, but while a trend is hot, a majority of people (not everyone, but a lot of people) follow whatever is popular- whether it be a clothing style, accessories (silly bandz anyone?), music, a book or author, electronics, etc. Just an FYI- I'm not knocking on following trends, because let's face it, I'm blogging :)

But as I have been thinking about trends, one thing that has really hit home is the way that 'beauty' and our bodies have been subjected to trends over time. For example, in the early 1900's, Victorian women wore corsets (pictured to the left) in order to make their waists appear smaller for the expressed purpose of accentuating their hips and butt, and to give them the illusion of being rounder and fuller. 20 years later, flapper girls were binding their breasts and working to achieve a boyish figure, thin and straight. 30 years later in the 1950's, Marilyn Monroe was THE icon of beauty. It surprises many people that she was a size 16. She had curves, and her body was the ideal.

It is important to note, as an aside, that throughout the shifts in trends with bodies and beauty, most of us women have tried hard to emulate them, no matter how radical the shift. Case in point, only 10 years later, Twiggy, the super skinny model (hence the name Twiggy) was all the rage and people wanted to look just like her! While thinness and weight loss have continued to be trends since that time, the 1980's were a time in which being fit and toned was considered ideal (Jane Fonda anyone?). When the 1990's rolled around, Baywatch Babe Pamela Anderson was a global icon- she was skinny with huge boobs, which became a major trend in the 90's. If you look around now, the majority of these 'looks' or 'ideals' seem to be outdated, meaning they are no longer in style. How do our bodies and beauty go out of style?

One thing that I have been thinking about is the sheer absurdity of our natural bodies (and how we define beauty) as being defined by trends. Surely, fashions change, and how we wear our makeup and clothes, etc, will change. But I think that we must learn to accept our bodies as they are, and celebrate them as they are because otherwise, we will have a relationship with our bodies that forces us to adapt and change with the trends, meaning we are never able to accept ourselves as we are. The only way for us to feel beautiful is to change ourselves. When the trends begin to change, we must change in order to accept and like ourselves and our bodies. That just seems backwards. It doesn't mean that we all don't ever play into the dynamic of trends, but I think that in considering the history of beauty and our bodies, we may see that beauty is something that goes way deeper, and cannot be defined by trends. If the ideal of beauty is changing every 10, 20, 30 years, maybe we should at least consider defining beauty in ways that don't change. It might help us be more confident, it might help us to accept ourselves and consequently, really love who we are! Think about it, and see what you come up with. Would love to hear your thoughts!

**(History/facts taken from thesite.org)