Race For The Cure and Body Image

The Susan G. Komen Race For The Cure took place in Raleigh, NC this past Saturday, and it was such an inspiring event. It held special meaning for me, as I have a grandmother and an aunt who have both battled breast cancer-- and survived!!! My aunt was actually in town from Oregon for follow up care at Duke, and so we formed a group and all participated together in this event. I have heard that participating in a Komen race is very different than other races, and as a first time participant, I think I saw why. First, there were SOOO many people that participated. If you look at the picture below-- it is a little tough to make out-- but as far as you can see, there are people that fill up the streets.

The other thing that seemed different to me was the heart and spirit in this event. I think that most people participating had been touched in some way by breast cancer. While my grandma and aunt are survivors, not everyone wins their battle with breast cancer. One of my friends that participated on our team lost her mother to breast cancer. Many, many people have lost loved ones to this illness and it is really heartbreaking.

The picture below is actually a shot of a few of the women that were on our team-- "Breast of Friends" : ) and you will notice the hot pink paper on these women's backs. These hot pink sheets of paper served as memorials to write names of people that you were walking in celebration of (survival), or in memory of, for those who have passed away. It was really sobering and emotional to see all of the names of people who have lost their lives to this illness. I think anytime, with any illness or disease, seeing names or faces make an impact because it personalizes the illness. In talking to my aunt over the course of her visit to Raleigh, she shared with me that battling and surviving breast cancer has changed her life and the way that she lives it in so many ways. One thing that she said that stood out to me was that she is thankful every single morning when she wakes up and realizes how blessed she is to be alive, and to have a body that works and is healthy.
This really impacted me and made me consider how her wise words can be applied to those of us who have not battled breast cancer! First, I think that her attitude of thankfulness is one to be emulated. There are a million ways that having an attitude of gratefulness and thankfulness can impact us-- as well as those around us. Whether it means that we worry a little less, we appreciate what we have more, or take our eyes off of what we lack and what we wish we had and focus on what we do have, it is always good to have perspective, and to live in a way that reflects that attitude.

Secondly, I think that this relates to body image and the ways that we think of and care for our bodies. I want to be clear, like I am often, that eating disorders are a mental illness. Part of having an eating disorder (diagnostically) is experiencing a severe disturbance and preoccupation with one's weight, shape, size, body-- so this is in no way meant to minimize the severity and nature of these thoughts. What I will say though, is that for those of us who struggle with body image and have a negative self-image, this may be a good reminder and an encouragement about all that our bodies can do for us, and how blessed we are to have bodies that are able to function how they are supposed to, that allow us to be active, and that allow us to experience life! Yes, it may be upsetting when our jeans fit more snug; yes, it may get you down when you flip through a magazine and see nothing but airbrushed 'beauties'; and yes, it may be frustrating when you don't feel good about yourself! These are all feelings that most women have experienced before, so you are not alone! But I will encourage you with the words of my brave aunt, who said that she wakes up every morning, thankful to be alive and to have a body that works. Rather than focus so much on the way that our bodies look, maybe if we start to appreciate all that our bodies do for us, and the fact that they allow us to experience life, we may begin to embrace our bodies a little more and appreciate them for what they are and what they do for us.

Turkey Day Anxiety: Part 2

Thanksgiving is tomorrow- and it seems like most people are either running around, making last minute preparations to host family and friends, or making sure that all the essential ingredients are present in their kitchens for cooking, or are packing/en route to be with family and friends. As I mentioned in my previous post (scroll down, or click here to read it), this time of the year is often accompanied by a significant amount of stress. Whether the holidays are stressful due to family tension, financial strain, or other difficult circumstances, one thing is certain- Thanksgiving has become a food holiday, meaning that food has become the main event.

What do we know about stress and eating? Well, for some people, stress during the holidays can lead to emotional eating, overeating, and/or binge eating, while for others who have struggled with restrictive eating, this tension may manifest in restrictive behavior with regards to the amount of food eaten or a preoccupation with what is being consumed. In addition, the heightened awareness that the media and our culture have placed upon food, weight, and our bodies has strongly impacted our beliefs about food. Therefore, a holiday that is centered around food can be triggering for anyone, but especially for those who are currently struggling with an eating disorder or eating issue, as it is not uncommon (unfortunately) for people to observe and make comments about who is eating how much, and how much weight so-and-so gained/lost since last year. If you are reading this, I would challenge you try to make it through this Thanksgiving without making any comments about what other people are eating, or how much they are eating, or any other comments along these lines. While this may seem like a minor adjustment to make, it would probably surprise you to find what an impact such a small change can make on others around you. If you are someone who struggles with an eating disorder, have struggled with one in the past, or struggle with body image issues, OR you will be spending this Thanksgiving with someone you love who you know or suspect struggles in any way with food, here are a few helpful tips, courtesy of NEDA, that may serve to alleviate the stress of such a time.

1. Worry more about the size of your heart than the size of your (fill-in-the-blank-body part). Think about how you can serve someone or do something nice for someone else- and do it. It helps to focus on others, and it helps to consider what you are thankful for.

2. Have conversations with your loved ones about things that matter to you all--dreams, goals, faith, relationships, concerns, fears, challenges, etc-- rather than focusing your energy and thoughts on food or body concerns.

3. Designate someone to be your 'support' person who you can call if you are struggling, or who you can talk with to encourage you to get through the tough moments.

4. Make goals for the day, and try to follow through with them. If you make goals with food, make sure you also make other non-food goals as well.

For more tips, follow this link for NEDA's complete list.

Here are some suggestions for families from Marcia Herrin and Nancy Matsumoto, authors of The Parent's Guide to Eating Disorders:

Try making your family’s holiday traditions more about relationships and activities than about food.

· Don’t skip meals or plan to undereat or diet the day following a family holiday.

· Talk to other family members in advance about not pushing food or commenting on diets, calories, or weight loss. Even too much emphasis on trying to make healthy choices at holiday meals can add to the stress.

· It is particularly important if your child is recovering from a serious eating disorder to have pre-warned family members about the kind of talk and attention that is appropriate. I suggest that parents develop a kind of code or signal that tells family members or other guests, “change the subject, and fast!”

· Because meal schedules may be altered and more snack foods and desserts are served during the holidays, it’s important that parents of an eating-disordered child be extra-solicitous and vigilant. If circumstances conspire to create a level of stress that interferes with your child’s recovery, you and your child should sit down and prioritize the extras in your lives. Remember that the first item on your list of important things to accomplish – even during the holidays -- should be your child’s recovery.

I think the most important thing to remember in all of this is the real meaning of Thanksgiving! No matter what we are going through, we always have things we can be thankful for. This doesn't minimize the tough things that some of us are going through or dealing with, but practicing gratitude does wonders for your outlook. Maybe you can make a list of all the things you are thankful for, or maybe you can make a point to discuss with your friends and family what you have been thankful for as you reflect on the past year. I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving!! I am so thankful for those of you who have been reading my blog, and for those of you who have encouraged and inspired me.

Stress: A Follow-Up ...

The last post that I made discussed tips for stress management, as this time of year can be stressful for returning students and parents alike.  This article, entitled 'Dealing With Back to School Blues' highlights a few pointers to help alleviate the stress that commonly occurs during this time of year. 

Stress...

With a new academic year in full swing, I have heard parents, college students and teenagers alike mention the increased level of stress that accompanies this time of year. Changes in routines and schedules can be stressful- regardless of whether the change is positive or negative. We tend to think of negative events as being stressful, but positive events can also trigger stress. Whether you are returning to school as a student, or you are a parent who has children returning to school, or you are neither and are undergoing stressful situations at work/home, learning how to healthily manage stress is an important skill to possess. For this reason, I thought that I would post some tips for managing stress, brought to you by the American Psychological Association :)

Stress Tip Sheet

In today’s fast-paced and ever-connected world, stress has become a fact of life. Stress can cause people to feel overwhelmed or pushed to the limit. The American Psychological Association’s 2007 “Stress in America” poll found that one-third of people in the U.S. report experiencing extreme levels of stress. In addition, nearly one-in-five report that they are experiencing high levels of stress 15 or more days per month. While low to moderate levels of stress can be good for you when managed in healthy ways, extreme stress takes both an emotional and physical toll on the individual.

With the consequences of poorly managed stress ranging from fatigue to heart disease and obesity, it is important to know how to recognize high stress levels and take action to handle it in healthy ways. Being able to control stress is a learned behavior, and stress can be effectively managed by taking small steps toward changing unhealthy behaviors.

APA offers the following tips on how to manage your stress:

Understand how you experience stress, Everyone experiences stress differently. How do you know when you are stressed"How are your thoughts or behaviors different from times when you do not feel stressed"

Identify your sources of stress.What events or situations trigger stressful feelings" Are they related to your children, family, health, financial decisions, work, relationships or something else"

Learn your own stress signals.People experience stress in different ways. You may have a hard time concentrating or making decisions, feel angry, irritable or out of control, or experience headaches, muscle tension or a lack of energy. Gauge your stress signals.

Recognize how you deal with stress. Determine if you are using unhealthy behaviors (such as smoking, drinking alcohol and over/under eating) to cope. Is this a routine behavior, or is it specific to certain events or situations" Do you make unhealthy choices as a result of feeling rushed and overwhelmed"

Find healthy ways to manage stress. Consider healthy, stress-reducing activities such as meditation, exercising or talking things out with friends or family. Keep in mind that unhealthy behaviors develop over time and can be difficult to change. Don't take on too much at once. Focus on changing only one behavior at a time.

Take care of yourself. Eat right, get enough sleep, drink plenty of water and engage in regular physical activity. Ensure you have a healthy mind and body through activities like yoga, taking a short walk, going to the gym or playing sports that will enhance both your physical and mental health. Take regular vacations or other breaks from work. No matter how hectic life gets, make time for yourself — even if it's just simple things like reading a good book or listening to your favorite music.

Reach out for support. Accepting help from supportive friends and family can improve your ability to manage stress. If you continue to feel overwhelmed by stress, you may want to talk to a psychologist, who can help you better manage stress and change unhealthy behaviors.